Jennifer J. Coldwater

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So d@mn proud.

Hey there, fellow badass!

I can’t help but smile thinking about how proud younger me would be if she saw me today. There’s something beautiful in reflecting on where we’ve been and seeing the distance we’ve traveled. Let me tell you this: You are a badass. And younger you? She knew it all along.

Let’s start with the question that might’ve haunted you as it did me for so long: Can you be queer and still love God? Hell yes, you can! If I could go back and tell my younger self anything, it would be that there’s no need to choose between your faith and your identity. The world might tell you otherwise, but you are allowed to be both.

Younger me never saw this possibility. She thought she had to be smaller, quieter, or less in some way. But here I am, living a life of love and faith without having to sacrifice one for the other. That’s something she would’ve never believed possible—and I’m so damn proud I proved her wrong.

If you’re like younger me, hiding your spiritual side because of fear or disconnection, let me share something I’ve learned: You can create a language of faith that resonates with you. Like in Holland, My Heart, the FMC says, “Good goddess in her heaven.” Holland is finding her own way, and so can you. Younger you would be amazed at how you’ve reclaimed the space that was always yours.

Every Version of You Deserves an HEA

One thing I wish I could’ve told younger me is that every single one of us deserves a Happily Ever After (HEA). In life, love, and faith, you are worthy of your happiest ending.

I remember the first time one of my readers told me that my book was the first queer story she’d ever read. It made me think of younger me—the one who longed for stories that made her feel seen and loved. That’s why I write them now. So you, too, can feel the love, acceptance, and joy you’ve always deserved. You’ve created a space that’s welcoming and inclusive, not just for others, but for yourself. Younger you would’ve been in awe of how far you’ve come.

Your Found Family—and Younger You—Are Cheering You On

Found family is at the heart of all my stories, and it’s something younger me yearned for. If you’ve found your people, your community—whether in real life, online, or through the pages of a book—you’ve done what younger you dreamed of. And if you’re still searching, don’t worry. They’re out there, waiting for you, just like they were waiting for me.

I often wonder if younger me would’ve been able to see the beauty in this journey. The way I’ve built a community full of love, faith, and authenticity. But deep down, I know she’d be proud, standing in the background, clapping, and saying, “You did it. You found your people.”

At the end of the day, a younger version you knew you were brave, beautiful, and deserving of all the love and joy this world has to offer. And here you are, living that truth, full of pride and light. Whether you’re navigating your queer identity, your allyship, your faith, or both, you’re not alone. We’re on this journey together, and younger you is smiling—because this is exactly what she dreamed of.

So go out there and keep living your biggest, boldest, queerest, God-loving life. Younger you would be so damn proud of the person you’ve become.