Cut scenes
Photo by Lamai PrasitsuwanI honestly did not cut much from draft to draft when I revised and edited Holland, My Heart.
But these two short scenes jumped out at me recently when I was reviewing my notes looking for some inspiration to finish Hannah’s Song.
Maybe it’s interesting to see where these bits started?
A note: I wrote the first draft of both books in third person, past tense. The closer I got to finishing Holland, My Heart, the more I wanted to tell the story first person, present tense. These two scenes were cut before I made the big switch.
Once again, he found himself taking inventory of all the things he felt for Holland. Lust still lurked in the dirtiest corner of his brain. But his admiration and respect for Holland’s work ethic, her ideas, her creativity had grown outsized to the attraction he felt. He definitely still felt responsible for her — and now for Naomi. He’d have to defend his friend’s action on behalf of her beloved daughter-in-law. He’d have to convince this brilliant beautiful bewitching woman that he knew her value.
I actually kind of miss this bit above. “Brilliant, beautiful, bewitching” is a great turn of phrase and I’m bummed it didn’t make it into the finished version.
“Hold your horses, there, sis,” Ximena placed a hand firmly on Holland’s arm. “I love you but you need to think very carefully about what you say next. He feels rejected, I imagine. You felt rejected, obviously. You’re both in weird headspaces right now. I think you should absolutely tell him how you feel. And I think you need a plan.”
This is advice Holland could have used, amirite?! When I found this in my notes, it was alone and dated July 15, 2021. I don’t think Holland would have made different choices (she’s so stubborn!), but I think it would have been nice to include this to round out Ximena and her cool head.
Now that NaNoWriMo is all wrapped up, I have finally finished the first draft of Hannah’s Song. Very soon, I should have an emotional, problems-in-paradise, witty, sexy romance with a love triangle twist for you to enjoy!
